So, today I wanted to talk about something that I had been struggling a lot with recently and have only just gotten over. I love horses (obviously) and before recently there had never really been a time when I hadn't wanted to go to the barn. I was always itching to go, and horse riding was the highlight of my day.
But recently, that sort of changed. I ran into a bit of a wall with horse riding, and I wasn't really making that much progress. When I rode, I never really achieved the things that I wanted to achieve and I came back from rides feeling sort of down for that reason. I suddenly wasn't really looking forward to it anymore. Horse riding turned into a lot more work and a lot less fun.
Not to say that I didn't still love horses - I did, and I still do. It's just, riding wasn't the highlight of my day anymore, and I didn't know how to change that. I felt really frustrated, because horses were practically my life. They were who I am. If I didn't love horse riding anymore, where would that leave me?
I thought a few things over. Maybe I should take a break? Maybe I should just go on a few relaxing trail rides? Maybe I had just outgrown horse riding, and it wasn't for me anymore.
But, just the other week, I had a really fantastic ride. Everything in that ride seemed to go right, and suddenly I was back in the game. It was as simple as that. Having a good ride made me remember why I loved horses so much.
And, in hindsight, I know that I didn't really fall out of love with horse riding. It was just a combination of
a) continually riding difficult horses. While they helped improve me as a rider, they also made my rides really exhausting and I could never really focus on myself and achieving my own personal goals
b) constantly switching to new instructors because my old one left and they are still finding a replacement.
and c) criticizing myself too much and focusing too much on the things I was doing wrong instead of the things I was doing right.
I guess what I'm trying to say with this mildly cheesy rant is that horse riding is an extremely complex sport where it is very easy to frustrate yourself because you aren't doing little things correctly. You don't have enough control, your heels won't stay down in your transitions, your leg isn't secure enough, your hands are not soft enough, your horse refuses to accept the bit - these are all problems that I've had in the past and sometimes, they are very hard to overcome, and this can make you extremely frustrated. However, it's also really important to just relax every once in a while, to have a good ride and just have fun. Because horse riding is a fun sport, and that was something that I was forgetting.
