Storytime Saturday #4: Fear of a horse

A few months ago I was riding a horse called Splash, and while my first ride with him was amazing from there it took a bit of a plummet. See, Splash was a very forward and spooky horse but also quite strong, and in the wrong circumstances it was a bit of a disastrous combination. 
During my second ride on him, he bolted around everywhere and simply wouldn't listen to me. He ran through my hands, spooked at corners, and was completely out of control. My third ride was similar, with him consistently running off and spooking at a farrier working nearby. It gave me a really helpless feeling, and I suddenly became aware of how big horses were and how easily Splash could seriously injure me if he wanted to.
I want to make it clear that I actually love forward horses. I would choose a forward and spooky horse over a lazy/stubborn one any day. However something about Splash made him different from all the other forward horses I've ridden. Even though he wasn't particularly big, he was so unpredictable and I felt like he could do anything and I wouldn't be able to stop him. And after those horrible rides on him he became the first and to this day only horse that I was truly scared of riding.
This continued in a cycle for my next few rides with him - I would be scared as soon as I got on him, he would run through my hands and ignore my aids, and both of us had had a bad experience by the end of the ride.
But one lesson, after seeing how frightened I'd gotten, my instructor rode Splash before me to get rid of some of his energy. She took him out for a gallop and when I got on him, he was a completely different horse. He was quiet, respectful, and at times I actually had to urge him forward instead of constantly trying to pull him back. That ride really changed my perspective of Splash; the next time I rode him I was no longer frightened of him and from there things only got better. 

I don't ride Splash much anymore, but by the end we were working really nicely together and, above all, he taught me so much. What I realized was that me being scared of him was honestly the one thing holding me back, which sounds cheesy but is completely true. When I rode him, instead of thinking rationally about how to address his problems, I had a constant death-grip on the reins. Instead of giving him a chance to improve, from the second I got on him I was anticipating his bolt and spook, making me very tense and only furthering the issue.
It's easier said than done, but try going into every ride with a fresh mind. If you don't think about the time when you fell off your horse, or when you had a completely terrible ride on them, you'll find yourself having a much more constructive ride.  

Rachel.